The Faux Glow

Late last night I spontaneously decided to apply a new self-tanner I had received as a gift from my mother. I have used self-tanners before so I knew to be extra careful around the toes, ankles, and knees. I wore a loose robe that only came to my knees for an hour afterward. I couldn't really see the effects of the tanner so I figured it just wasn't for me and I went on to bed. This morning I woke up and noticed there was a chill in the air...THANK GOODNESS because I would most certainly be wearing long pants today! It turns out that the tanner took effect while I snored the night away. It also turns out that I did not do such a good job when it came to my toes, ankles, and knees. The first thing I noticed was this large dark brown smudge on the top of my big toe. Then I noticed a few large white splotches surrounded by orangey-brown swirls around my ankles. My feet were outlined in what looked like a mud ring. I stood in my bathtub and scrubbed as hard as I could but there was no washing off of the self-tanner. Nevertheless I wore some gold high-heeled strappy sandals and threw some toenail polish in my purse to apply once I got to work.

It was while I was driving to work that something else caught my eye...something brown. Apparently while washing my hands after applying the goop all over my legs some of it ran down the length of my right arm. I had a perfectly tanned half of a forearm. Once again I voiced my gratitude for the unexpected cool front because it justified the wearing of long today.

Tonight I scrubbed until my orangey-brown skin turned red. Tomorrow I'm wearing a long skirt.