The Beach is for the Birds!

Yes, t'was I who ranted on and on about vacations in a previous post...but due to a spontaneous moment of weakness (and desperation) we packed an overnight bag and drove down to the coast. You know...one last "hurrah!" before summer ends (although with the current heat wave I'm beginning to think summer may be a lot longer lasting this year). Of course, we made the jaunt for the kids. WHY ELSE WOULD YOU SUBJECT YOURSELF TO THE STICKY ELEMENTS??!! WHY???? I have heard that other beaches are glorious...they must be what with all of the magazine spreads of people walking the beach IN THEIR CARDIGAN SWEATERS! This is simply UNIMAGINABLE down here in Texas. For someone like me the coast is something to be endured "for the sake of the children." I could have just as easily stayed home in the air conditioning and slammed my fingers in the car door---would have had the same effect. Although I could have actually simulated the whole "experience" by turning up my heater, slathering myself with baby oil, jumping into a sand-filled bathtub, standing in front of a fan so that my hair whips and twists and ultimately sticks to my lips and gets in my eyes, and then, for the coup de gras, sticking my head in the oven!

Yes, the ocean fascinates me...yes, I love dolphins...no, I do not like sitting beneath a tarp with my arms bent out like a buzzard cooling itself in the wind.