I have never sat across from a psychiatrist and analyzed an inkblot before...but I'm very curious as to what one would have to say about me after I showedthem the inkblot I created. You see, even though I live out in the sticks I still try to maintain some form of dignity. I try to make myself feel regal and fancy and sophisticated...something that is very difficult to pull off considering the amount of gnats and 'no-see-ums' that flit about our home. Take last night for example: A nice glass of wine while reading a book just before drifting off to sleep would be the perfect ending to my week...or so I thought. It turned out that while I was changing into my pajamas a herd of gnats decided to rob me of such an indulgence. I got all snuggled into bed, propped myself up against my favorite pillows, opened my book, and then reached for my glass---aaaggghh! Instead of delicately sniffing and sipping my wine I ended up dipping and wiping my wine. Fortunately, or unfortunately, I have mastered the art of the retrieval of gnats from wine glasses. One merely has to gently touch the gnat with the tip of one's finger, just barely skimming the surface of the wine, and WHALLAH! You've got yourself one perfectly extracted drunken gnat. After each extraction I would wipe my finger free on the small notepad I keep on my nightstand...for just such an occasion (not really...it's there in case of sudden insight...note it was BLANK prior to the gnat blots). I suppose the saying about taking the girl out of the country really is true...what's even scarier is that I've actually written about wine gnats in a previous blog!
Instead of purchasing a bucket of citronella, listening to the shock and awe of a bug zapper, or covering yourself in sprays and lotions why not multitask and invest in a good bottle of wine? It has come to my attention that the tiny and irritating bugs of summer prefer a good merlot!
No comments:
Post a Comment