Monday, June 9, 2008

I left my kids at home...alone...and I'm lovin' it!!!

While I'm still stuck in my summer technology inservice I thought I would continue to work on this blog (before you start to think that I am a complete inservice slacker let me just say that this workshop is specifially about all things Google...including Blogging!!!). I am actually enjoying sitting in this hard, blue ,plastic ,student chair...and the reason being this: I am "alone!" (well, as "alone" as one can be with 21 other people crammed in a frigid computer classroom, albeit hidden behind monitors).

You see, I am NEVER without my kids and, while at first this was the way that I wanted it, now I am not so sure. With summer break staring me in the face, I am even more aware of just how "close" we are. In year's past I would have spent three days prior to my inservice strategically planning who was going to be able to watch my kids for eight hours and where we would meet to drop off/pick up (and I would also have spent a month putting off the planning of this). But this time it was different...much different. I simply set my alarm, got up, got ready...and left. As simple as that. No coercing, no searching for articles of clothing, no crying (them or me). Wow. As I drove off I battled with the notion of listening to what I wanted to listen to on the radio versus not even turning the darn thing on. I drove without shrieks and shouts from the backseat.

I was looking forward to my day ahead. What was happening to me?! When have I *ever* looked forward to an all day technology inservice?! Was today the first step? The first step that would take me down a dark and twisting path that would no doubt have me traveling towards...a life...(gulp) of my *own*?! At the risk of sounding like a mother who wants to run away from her kids (and believe me...the thought has crossed my mind a time or two!) it's not really that ... exactly. It is more of a rebirth of sorts. I think that as mothers we become so absorbed in our children's lives that it is often hard to pull back from them with who we once were in tact. But then again we truly aren't who we once were...and I am glad that I am not...but I still want to find some of the bitz and pieces I may have left behind. And if it takes attending an inservice to find them...then so be it!

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